So first the good news and then I will tell you about the day we had. So the tumor in the colon is a polyp and does not require surgery at this time...A little good news to make me cry with happiness. He does not need surgery and chemo begins again on Monday. Power in prayers!
So Cody was in some mood and insisted on riding the train alone. I was beside myself. I drove in and he rode the train. I actually got there before he did. We left home at 5:45 am. He was scheduled for an MRI at 9 am at the other Sloan facility a few blocks away. He was in the IV room getting a push of dilaudid, the pain med so he could lie flat for the MRI. The nurse was pushing it in very slowly. Cody felt it immediately and was getting silly. Next thing we know, he says everything looks blotchy and he is out. His head goes back and he nearly slides out of the chair. VERY quickly the nurses come in and he is lifted to a wheelchair and they are checking pressure and giving his smelling salts and he is rushed to the back in the bed area. His pressure is low and they start a bag of fluids to flush the dilaudid. He slowly wakes up and doesn't know what happened. He is very groggy but comes around, thank goodness. I cried all the way there today so my emotions were raw. I lost it. Thank goodness he did not see that. So this makes us late for MRI. Uncle Jim comes and helps me wheel him 2 blocks to the MRI place at the other location.
We get in and they tell us we are late and that they do not have room. I called his drs back and within about 30 minutes, they find room. He was not told that he had to drink 3 bottles of a barium mixture so they could see the colon better. He finishes one and is very nauseous and shaky. Around that time, the supervisor comes out and says to stop drinking. We don't know why. Then we get a team of drs there to tell us that he is not getting an MRI but a CT scan. They were in touch with our drs and agreed that a CT scan would give a better picture of what they are looking for. So we are waiting for the CT scan. Finally they fit us in and failed to tell us that he needed a rectal barium. The solution would be an enema injected via a catheter into his rectum. Of course he was not too happy about it but at that point we just wanted to get it over. And we did. He did well and we left and headed back to the main hospital.
We were there waiting for the PET scan. We checked in and he was waiting to speak to his psychiatrist. The team apologized for the mix up and Dr. Wexler came out. He came right over and told Cody that the tumor was actually a polyp and that he would not need surgery. We are leaving it alone for now. We are to report Monday and start chemo again.
Now I have to work on his metal state over the weekend. I am calling tomorrow to get set up with the counseling center for next week for myself. Hopefully we can relax a few days and get through this.
I am ready for bed now....good night.
Mary:
ReplyDeleteI am going to step out and say something of which I know. Men/boys are not generally the greatest patients.!!! They don't think like women! When you are physically exhausted and mentally strained,,,and then have your loved one challenge you in a hostile manner, you just don't know quite where to put this new emotion with which you are forced to deal You can't take any of it personally...now, how can I say that when you are willing him with everything you have to get well! It actually is a backhanded compliment......He knows he can trust you...to continue to love him even if he is horrible to you! Moms have unconditional love..and he probably knows that you are the safest one to lash out at. However, that is not to say that
when the time is right, you can't gently tell him that you know he loves you and he is very angry....but that you would appreciate an effort to remember how exhausted and emotionally drained YOU are....and he could help a bit if he could rein it back!
And if he can't....well, this is what Mom's do.....they fight FOR their kids..even if it means letting them fight WITH you.
The only suggestion is if you are worried about him being on his own, maybe you could get the Dr to tell him he has faith in him...but it is the meds that can do unforseen things...and therefore, for the safety of him and anyone around him, he needs to "allow" someone to accompany him. Don't know if logic will work at this stage...but nothing ventured...nothing gained.
You are woman...you are strong! You can do this, Mary.....and do get someone professional who sees this all the time..to help you. You are no good to anyone, if you fall apart!
Here's angels on your shoulders////
Love and support
Barb
You said it, Barb..as I sit here writing through tears, it is hard. I know I have to do but breaks my heart too. I will keep going strong as he is!
DeleteThanks for your sweet words....xoxoxoxox
Mary
Hi Mary, I'm glad to hear there is finally some better news. I guess Cody seems to be demanding some space. It's very tough I admire your strength in being able to provide it for him. We're thinking of you & Cody constantly and hope more good news is just around the corner.
ReplyDeleteSending hugs & love,
Gary
Hi Gary,
DeleteSo crazy as you know too well. But yes to the better news. I will give Cody all the space he needs but don't want to jeopardize his health as you know too.
We do what we need to do and somehow we get through it.
Thank you for your sweet words....Mary
Mary,
ReplyDeleteI think that your friend Barb's idea of having the doctors explain that he cannot be unaccompanied on his trips to and from the city is an excellent one. As he knows from the reactions he's had to different medications, things happen all the time even when he is being attended to and if something were to happen when he is alone, there is no one there who knows where to take him or what he medical status is.
It's no fun being a punching bag but he does love you so much and obviously also knows that you will be there for him no matter how he behaves. Sucks but it's true.
Keep your chin up, keep loving that boy, seeing your therapist will help, maybe he will go to see someone, too? Thinking of you both all the time.
xoxo,
Diane
Hi Diane,
ReplyDeleteYes, seeing a therapist trained in this field will help. He already sees one from Sloan.
We do what we have to do. It is hard but we do it. Thanks for always writing back. We are going to meet one of his teachers tomorrow. She lives in Merrick. Inbox me your number. Not sure if we are going there or she is coming here. Are you around tomorrow?
Thanks again..I feel the love and the support. Thank you.
XOXOXOX
Mary